Friday, August 29, 2014

The night before your First Birthday.

Tomorrow morning I will wake up and be a mommy to the sweetest little one year old. 

I have no idea how that happened. I still think of you (and call you) my tiny little newborn baby.

On this day last year, at around 3 o'clock, I found out that you would be making your grand entrance tomorrow, August 30th. I was experiencing high blood pressure and the doctor told us to be at the hospital at 4:30 am to be induced.

I was excited, nervous, scared, panicky, and in complete shock! I thought I still had 15 or so days to prepare for your arrival. We left the doctors appointment and couldn't believe that we would be meeting you the very next day. On Labor Day weekend. Your daddy couldn't get over the fact that we had to be there at 4:30! I couldn't get over the fact that I would be delivering a baby the next day!!

We called all of our family. They all couldn't believe it and were so excited. Your Aunt Sis freaked out. She was in Charleston and immediately came home! 
We set up your bassinet, made sure everything was in our hospital bag, and tried to stay calm and focus on how happy we were to finally meet you. 

We barely slept at all that night. I slept for a little bit but I don't think your daddy got any sleep. The next morning, we had a light breakfast and headed off to the hospital. 

It's amazing how fast our lives changed that day. So many things happened before we finally got to meet you. But seeing you and holding you (no matter how brief) made all of the craziness of the day melt away. 

You have changed my life in more ways than I thought possible. You have made me the happiest and luckiest person in the world. Your daddy loves you with his whole heart and is always trying to make our lives the best it can be. You have changed us. Forever. You have made us parents. And that is our greatest and most important job. 

You have grown from this tiny, sleepy baby to a sweet little girl who loves to explore, climb and cuddle. You have learned so many things in this last year it's hard to comprehend what all you will learn in the next.

This past year has been the hardest, most rewarding, sleepless, greatest year of my life. This year has taught me patience, understanding, compassion, and so much more. I have learned so much about friendships and relationships. Your daddy and I have grown in our relationship in this past year.  We have learned how to forgive each other better and love on a deeper level. This is all because of you. You have already changed so many people lives in your short little 12 months with us. 

As I'm rocking you to sleep on the night before your first birthday, I can't help but think of how I felt holding you when you were so tiny. I loved you so much then, more than I thought I could love anyone. But as I hold you now, I love you so much more and my heart is so full it could literally burst. I know as you start talking more and showing your sweet little personality, my heart will continue to grow and I will continue to love you more and more. It's so amazing what our hearts are capable of. 

I hope you have the sweetest of dreams tonight as you sleep. And even though you pretty much sleep through the night now, I won't mind it if you wake up so I can come rock my tiny little newborn again before you wake up in the morning and turn One.

I love you my sweet baby and look forward to what this next year holds for our little family. 

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